Cooking in the kitchen

Today we baked one of my favorite cakes . . . ever, and it was delicious.  What might you wonder is this delectable dessert?  It is . . . wait for it . . .Peanut Butter Sheet Cake!  It is so peanut buttery and delicious and sweet and just damn tasty.  Now I found this recipe on Pinterest.  If you are not a part of this wonderful website then you are not living!!!! If you have even one crafty cell in your body, like to cook, try new recipes, fashion, or literally just about anything else you can imagine, Pinterest is a MUST! Now that I am done selling this fabulous mecca of creativity and ingenious ideas, back to THE CAKE. You can find the recipe on this blog. It is just so fantastic I can't sing its praises enough. Now if you don't like peanut butter, you're just wrong and something isn't right with you on so many levels!! You probably are not going to find this recipe to your liking. But if you are peanut butter fan like me and really that is the only way to be, this one is a winner.  I thought the kiddos might like helping me make this one since it has a ton of steps and one can be on the stove while one is mixing the dry ingredients and as you can see by their little faces they had a blast being little bakers.

They pretended they were on a cooking show and went to town mixing and sifting  and tasting of course. (Sometimes I wonder if the only reason they want to help is so that they can taste all the batter.) In the end it was decided they were both "sweet geniuses" and got to eat a spoonful of frosting as their reward seeing as mom does not have $20,000 to hand out.

Here is the cooling cake . . . yes that is my turkey roasting pan it is in. The recipe calls for a jelly rolled cookie sheet (which I don't have) so this is the only pan I have that is big enough to accomodate the cake.  Hey it works and without this picture you would never know!

This cake does have a bunch of steps, but it is soooooo good, and so it is worth it.  Word to the wise, I have made this cake with buttermilk substitute (milk with a bit of vinegar), because who in world has buttermilk just lying around in the refrigerator. Not me! I did find it to be moister with the buttermilk, but the difference is not huge.  Oh, did I mention how completely delicious this cake is.  It is like cake and peanut butter balls mixed together in complete deliciousness.  Normally I am a die hard chocolate fan, but this cake is chocolate free and is so terrifically yummy. If you do rally your troops and put on a little cooking show be prepared to make it again and again.  And dare you take it out of the house to someone's house, you will be hounded for the recipe even by people you don't even know . . . this I promise!

As for me and the babies, we had a blast tasting and making decisions on is it really sweet enough??? I mean can you really have too much sugar??? They are so funny when they try to be like food network tv.  Now whether the peanut butter cake will last til tomorrow? That I cannot promise!  Yeah, its that good.

Changes

So it has been forever since I have been on this blog. Life has changed quite a bit. Peter is still deployed, yes I know it seems like he should be home - trust me I know, but it isn't too far off. He came home for R and R what seems like forever ago and we went to Disney (so much fun), I took a job teaching kindergarten and I lost 20 pounds. Grace has grown, Ben has grown and school is coming to a close in just one short month believe it or not. The Dell's are still here, we are just monumentally busy all the time it seems. But we are still alive and well in Lawton and Peter overseas. Have I said in the last 5 minutes how much I miss my husband and can't WAIT for him to come home?

Lost It

So what do you do when you have totally lost it with your kids. You have flown off the handle, your upset, they are upset, and you're not sure how to take a step back and look at the reality of the situation. You have gone so far over the edge that climbing back out seems harder than just staying mad?

I found out the answer today, slowly but surely you calm down, apologize, try to mend the hurt in them, explain in rational tones why you were upset, and take back the consequence you gave letting them know you are human too and you just made a huge mistake and ask for their forgiveness.

I hate it when I have to learn the hard way. Lesson learned.

The Promise of a Mother's Prayers

I have a devotional book called "The Promise of a Mother's Prayers" and it has been my favorite for years. I have probably gone through it at least 4 different time and am on my 5th. The book is divided into 31 different 2 page devotionals where Scharlotte Rich talks about the real deal of being a mom. She breaks the supermom myth and talks about the reality of what every mom struggles with patience, unconditional love . . . all the time. Here are a couple of the prayers that are included that have really stuck with me these last few days.

This one was after a devotional on what legacy you will pass onto your children:

Lord, thank you for the new legacy you have given me as your child of grace. Help me pass the things you have taught me on to my children so they can start a little ahead of where I was. Give me you wisdom as I raise them. Help me understand their strengths and teach them to follow you.

I pray for my children, that you would break any hold past sins and family weaknesses would have on them. Let what has been hidden come to light. Put your wall of protection around them. Grow their strengths and give them courage to walk in your ways, even though sometimes they will have to walk a differnt path from their friends and acquaintances. Give them hearts that are soft toward the things that matter to you. Prevent any ungodly legacies from being passed on to them. Please give each child a special gift that he or she can use for your glory and pass on as a new legacy.

After a devotional on not being a "perfect mom":

Thank you Father God, that your love is not based on my performance. Please open my eyes to any ways I may have unintentionally placed unrealistic expectations on my children. Please replace my worries with faith in you. Please help my children learn that you are trustworthy and that your love is on based on their performance.

i just loved these two, so I thought I would share. I have to say there is nothing more powerful than praying for your children and seeing what you have prayed for grow in them.

The Fair

So we took the kids to a mini fair tonight. We had intentions to go the Strawberry Festival, but the traffic was ridiculous, so we pulled into the mall and there was a little carnival there. The kids had a blast. I am always amazed at how riding the same 6 rides over and over that all just seem to go around in a circle essentially (Elephants in a circle, train in a circle, cars in a circle, dragons in a circle) thrill them to no end. But 3 hours, 2 corn dogs, 2 stuffed seals, and 2 happy children later we are home! Not a bad night.

Temper

So I have a tendency to sometimes lose my cool with my little ones. I am going to do better at counting to 10, taking a breather, and staying calm so I can see them for who they really are - a 4 year old and a 2 year old, who are learning and growing everyday soaking up every move I make so that they know how to be adults themselves. I so often feel like I want them to leave behind their baby ways and throw away their plate without being asked, pick up after themselves, and not bother me when I am on a business phone call. However, I think those are unfair expectations of them. They are so young and still learning all that, they will have the rest of their lives to be grown ups. I know I need to relish this baby time, because before I know it they won't be kids anymore and I will want back that snuggle time. I will wish I spent more time cuddling and playing and less time nit picking.

Rosie

So we have a new addition to our family, Rosie. Who might you ask is Rosie, a dog, cat maybe? No, Rosie is Grace's "imanginary daughter." Not imaginary friend or pet, her daughter.

I was watching the kids play outside the other day and Grace was pushing the swing (with no one on it)and talking to "Rosie." When I asked her who Rosie was, she said, she's my daughter. Granted Rosie is not a traditional imaginary friend, she doesn't go with us all the time and only seems to pop up on occasion, but what I notice when Rosie is around is that Grace tends to sound alot like me. It can be very weird to hear your words come out of your daughter's mouth. Although most of it was very sweet and gentle, I did notice a couple of harsh tones and words that I recognized as something I had said to Grace before. It reminded me (again) that my kids are sponges and soak up every word I say, every smile, every bad attitude, every bit of playfulness, and every harsh tone I use.

I in no way have the expectation that I have the ability to raise my kids to be perfect angels all while perfectly dressed and never raising my voice, because I can use the "voice of reason" instead (you cannot reason with a 2 year old). I gave up on that pipe dream a while ago, but I think I do need to be more careful that I don't let my temper get the best of me on a regular basis. There is nothing more special than being a mom, and I love my kids with all my heart and I want to make sure that they know that without a shadow of a doubt.

I want there to be more I love you's than time-outs, more hugs and kisses than angry words, more laughing than crying, and more playfulness than arguments. I just have to keep reminding myself because there is nothing more devious than the monotony of everyday to steal those thoughts from me. So I guess my fight is against the everyday and finding the joy in making my 1,000 ham and cheese sandwich, saying go back to bed for the millionth time with the same calm as I did the first time, or laughing and playing while I clean up the playroom that I just cleaned 10 minutes ago (It's amazing what kids can do in 10 minutes).

So, Fight Against the Monotony!!!! This week coming up I am going to find a new way to look at the laundry or the dishes! It's all about the perspective.

Kids

It's Monday:

Grace got sick earlier this morning, No actual throw up (until later) only wretching, which I don't know what is worse? As a mommy, I know that you should have some immunity to throwing up, poop, and all the other gross things that go along with kids, but to tell you the truth, I still find throw up turns my stomach. Oh, I sit there in the moment and hold her hair back and tell her everything is going to be okay, Mommy's here, but I am breathing through my mouth the whole time. And now all I can think about is the trailer for that new movie (which looks hilarious by the way) Four Christmases with Vince Vaughn and Resse Witherspoon. She's holding that baby and it throws up on her and he just starts gagging and telling her she has to leave or else he's going to throw up too. I literally am laughing while I am writing this picturing the scene. If you haven't seen the trailer, you won't get what I am saying, but if you have I know you are right there with me . . . hilarious and so true. Anyway, baby girl seems to be doing much better and is watching Movie Time Monday. She's eating Cheez-It's, hopefully they don't make a reappearance later.

Ghetto and Fabulous

So I have admit, I have always considered myself a little on the ghetto side at times, but aren't we all. For example, I have a bad habit of taking things off the shelf, then finding something comprable at a better price on some other aisle and I will leave my original purchase where ever I am in the store. Ham comes to mind. I once had the lady slice me some ham at the deli counter and then when I got the prepackaged meat section they had buy one get one free on Hillshire Farms ham, so I just left my deli ham there in the case and took the buy one get one ham instead Hey don't judge me, at least I left it in a cooler area instead of on a shelf, although I have done that before too.

And I won't even go into the tarp incident that I had today, let's just say it involves my neighbor's yard and giant, plastic, blue, walmart tarp with neon orange stakes attached to it, need I say more.

I also find that I don't always wear shoes to drive and pick up Grace from preschool. God forbid they ever need me to get out of the van for some reason, the ghettoness of it all will be too much . . . I don't even want to think about it, I may have to come up with some excuse like my butt is glued to the seat?!? I also don't wear shoes when I take the kids outside. My across the street neighbor is out there regularly and she and her daughter wear shoes, as well as my next door neighbor and her boys. I have on occasion looked around and realized my kids and I are not wearing shoes and Ben is regularly in just a tshirt and diaper (all he needs is bottle full of coke to complete the look). Grace is hair all a mess and wearing her latest wardrobe creation (and I use the word creation loosely) and think uhhh, wow I'm so ghetto and I am wearing off on my kids too.

So here I am in all my ghetto fabulousness raising little prodigies of shoeless Riverview existence with my dear husband (who I think lacks the ability to be ghetto in any way) and loves us all the same. Amen for a hubby who can look past permanently redneck dirty feet, a stained shirt and sticky faced kids and think wow I have the best family in the world.

Patience

Sometimes I feel like my patience is paper thin. Things that would normally never bother me become life and death. A misplaced crayon bucket becomes an international affair until it is found, a messy playroom is marked as a disaster area until it is cleaned, and a toy left on the floor is like hazardous waste that requires a 20 minute discussion on why it wasn't put away properly. I swear sometimes I think I'm crazy or getting very close to the edge. I hate when I yell at my kids and when I get to this point I generally do about ridiculous things. It totally stinks to yell and the apologize, because I know that I have already wounded them with my words. I am so thankful that they are so forgiving and full of unconditional love for their imperfect mommy.